You want to move beyond the tired, old-school "get to yes" compromise that leaves both parties unhappy. You want the secrets of a former FBI international hostage negotiator. You want the raw, psychological warfare tactics that work when the stakes are life and death—applied to your next salary review, car purchase, or business deal.
Them: "I don't think we can pay more than $50,000." You: "Can't pay more than $50,000?" never split the difference by chris voss pdf
Never ask "Do you agree?" Ask "Is this ridiculous?" The "No" triggers a sense of safety and autonomy. The person who says "No" feels like they are in charge. Let them be the captain, but you steer the ship. 5. Calibrated Questions: The "How" and "What" of Control Avoid "Why" questions—they sound like accusations. Instead, use Calibrated Questions starting with "How" or "What." You want to move beyond the tired, old-school